Dalio and Kissinger on playing the Infinite Game

Earlier this week, Ray Dalio, author the brilliant book Principles, posted on his social media a speech that he gave at an event for the Committee on US-China relations. He also shared another short speech from the event by Henry Kissinger, who famously opened our relations to China in the early 1970s. In addition to …

Churchill and Roosevelt Negotiate a Quid Pro Quo

It was the summer of 1940 and Winston Churchill was waiting patiently to hear back from President Roosevelt regarding his increasingly urgent requests for war time assistance. Weeks earlier, France had formally surrendered to the Nazis, and now Britain was also hanging on for dear life. Determined to avoid becoming another one of Hitler’s recent …

A Counter-intuitive Lesson From Two Top Negotiating Experts

Last week, the Schranner Negotiation Institute held their renowned N-Conference in New York City for the first time, assembling an incredibly impressive lineup of experts to speak on the topic of “Decision Making Under Pressure”. In addition to the tremendous amount of insight provided for making better decisions when negotiating in high pressure situations, one …

Before The Duel – What We Can Learn About Conflict Resolution From The Negotiation Between Hamilton and Burr

Before there was the duel, there was the negotiation. And it is hard to find a better example of what not to do when trying to save face and resolve conflict than can be seen in the letters between Alexander Hamilton and Aaron Burr.

Brian Cashman’s Face Saving Press Conference

Last week, Yankees General Manager and top Negotiator Brian Cashman had to face the media for the first time after the team’s devastating ALCS loss against the arch rival Houston Astros. At a certain point things took a harsher turn, resulting in the press conference becoming more newsworthy than it would normally be after Cashman …

Ghosted

Being ghosted is one of the common phenomenons that salespeople experience day in and day out. After so much perceived “rejection”, it can be easy for anyone to fall into the trap of believing their prospect is no longer interested. According to face theory, the most common way that we deal with face threats to …

Once Upon a Time in Washington D.C…

The year was 1969, and Henry Kissinger was shortly to become the world’s most famous negotiator.  One of his early victories as National Security Advisor was getting the Sovet Union to reduce their restrictions on Jewish emigration, resulting in tens of thousands being able to leave the communist country over just a few years time. …

Expression Games – Why Erving Goffman and Malcolm Gladwell Believe We’re All Secret Agents

In his brilliant new book “Talking To Strangers”, Malcolm Gladwell takes an extremely close look at how we’re often deceived by others – until it’s too late. He does this by recasting in vivid detail a wide range of famous cases, including the stories of the exposed Cuban spy Ana Montes, Bernie Madoff, Jerry Sandusky, …

Positive Politeness – Strategies & Tactics

According to Politeness Theory, there are three key strategies that salespeople and negotiators use to minimize FTAs: claiming common ground, conveying cooperation, and fulfilling wants. Claiming Common Ground  Within this first strategy are the tactics of noticing, exaggerating, seeking agreement, and avoiding disagreement. Noticing is accomplished by paying compliments, such when we comment on something …

Why “Let me check with my Manager…” is an incredibly effective ritual

Last weekend, I went car shopping and was offered a slight discount on the initial price under two conditions: First, the salesperson had to convince his manager to approve this special discount. Second, I had to commit to purchasing on the spot if his gamble was approved.  After I affirmed on both counts, he disappeared …